Sacred Art Of Dying (5-8)

Sacred Art of dying by Kenneth Kramer talks about “What is the purpose on death? Does existence end at death? Are we re-embodied in a similar or in a different form? Is there a final judgment? And how are we to prepare for our own dying?"(pg. 1). The weird part of this all is I ask these questions or think about them a lot. What happens when I die? Is there really such thing as heaven and hell? To tell you the truth is that I do believe in heaven and hell.I believe there is life after this and I believe there is a final judgment. I believed in God all my life, but it’s not only to believe in him, it has to do with your actions and the choices you have to make here on earth. I could say I was spiritually dead, even though I was raised in a religious family, I didn't consider myself religious.  When a person is “Religious” in my eyes, it’s someone who dedicates his whole life to god and was far from that.Even though I always believe in God it felt like I was following in the devils path instead. The world felt like hell to me, the society we live in is based on hell, people killing people, people getting raped and there is still racism in the world, war, violation of drugs that takes over our whole life and becomes are main focus, or even people not knowing their own worth, women sleeping with men like if that's what they were born to do.  Men sleeping with variety of women like they didn't come out of one and have no respect. Freedom? Where is freedom? I felt like I was in a dark hole and no light shining my way. I would always feel lost and felt like there was no way out "A kind of emotional death” like Morrie says,

"Where the feelings were blunted and it was easy to cease caring about being alive" (pg. 19)

 I was depressed crying myself to sleep and nobody would know because I wouldn't show it, I felt like I was wearing a mask so nobody would know what I was really hiding. Parties I loved them, alcohol and weed would take me out of reality. Every time I got high I would feel week and felt like the devil was taking over me, the way I looked at people became different, full of anger. Yes I’m 19, but I have questions, I think too much and I want to know answers. Everyone has their own experiences on life and we either learn from them or continue the path we are in .I wanted to be different, I was done following the crowd. I knew I was better than this. Who am I? I asked myself, a drunk? A pothead? Or person that is going nowhere in life. I asked god to help me and that's exactly what he did.  I put my life in god’s hands and I trust him. I’m free finally from everything I that was bringing me down.  I had so many questions and lately I have had them answered in a different ways.I read this book called 23 minutes in hell by Bill Wiese. Bill actually had the opportunity to experience life in hell and God allowed for him to come back to earth and he became a preacher to help millions  Bill said,

A picture of Billl Wiese
photo: google 

"One of the worst sensations I experienced was an insatiable thirst and dryness. I was so extremely thirsty. My mouth was so dry it felt as if I had been running through the desert for days. There was no water, no humidity in the air, no water anywhere. I desperately longed for just one drop of water, like the man in torment in Luke 16:23, just one drop of water would have been so precious to me “(pg. 1) There was no work, no goals, no wisdom, and no opportunity to speak to anyone or to solve any problem. No need to offer advice, help, or comfort of any kind " (pg. 23).

A few months later I entered my class coping with life and death and had to read The Sacred Art of drying and read the story of Betty Maltz as she had also experienced the afterlife but hers was completely opposite. Betty said,  

A picture of Betty Waltz
photo: google 

"I was climbing a velvet green hill, where each blade of grass was vibrantly alive. The climb was effortless." “I looked up and saw, dancing like dust particles in the sunbeam, two- inch ivory letters. They were Jesus words from john 11:25: I' am the resurrection and the life." I reached up and touch each word that I saw in the sunbeam. When I touched the warmth and healing entered my body and filled me with life" (pg. 12). 




 and for myself i am doing much better, I am at peace and see life, my life different.  I’m choosing the right path. Who am I? I am not a drunk nor a pothead and I am going somewhere in life despite the struggles and fears that will pass my way in life, I know I am not alone through this journey. In the Novel Tuesdays with 

Morrie, Morrie said,

"He taught about the meaning of life and it was taught by experience" (pg. 6)

Just how everyone speaks on what they went through I have no shame speaking on what I went through. It might help someone out, because that's exactly what other people experiences did  to me. Life is a gift but heaven is a blessing and if I can be bad why can’t I be good? I shall be good because I’m done being bad.